I am about to share a piece of information that isn’t news to anyone who has lived with me, but has come as quite a stinging slap to me:
I suck as a roommate.
I’ve always operated under the precious delusion I was the one being put upon. Year after year, I would end up with a new batch (sometimes up to 20 different roommates in one year) of girls, and I would think to myself:
These people are seriously flawed.
List of Grievances
3. Lacking in Musical Talent/Expression (You wouldn’t think this would be a factor, but my roommates are/were privy to my unveiled venomous musical criticism. I’ve been downright insulting.)
10. Not Very Bright
12. Possess a Myopic Perspective
13. An Intrusion on My Space
14. Incapable of Changing The Toilet Paper Dispenser
Naturally, I never once fell into any of these categories. I have never been culpable.
Unfortunately, the years are passing, and I’ve started to see a factor in my roommate failures: The Common Denominator is Me.